Monday, August 09, 2004
Just this past Friday I was able to attend a youth service where former MBA superstar Alex Compton delivered a testimony of his conversion, which really moved a lot of us out there in the congregation mainly because of the fact that for such people like me I have become so familiar with Christianity in general that our own personal experiences of salvation have somehow almost faded into the back of our minds already and that no longer do take the time to really think about the full extent of God's work in our lives.
And looking back at it I could still remember the preplexing thoughts that I had then which were better expressed with Aga's teary eyes as I prayed for him during the closing of the service. He said that like me he also regretted the loss of time that we both spent as "armchair christians". As I listened to his words such thought a feeling of remorse also entered my mind and that indeed for me I've almost spent both my years in high school and in college merely as a silent type of christian who discuss God merely in an intellectual level rather than out of genuine concern for the souls of the lost that are around me.
But the thing is that despite of that I also felt a sense of comfort since I am here now talking about such with a fellow believer that have also grown cold in the faith, but to look at it in the present context one will ask where am I right now?
I'm here at church praying for God's comfort for this weary bretheren. So later on I spoke to him of how I also fell to the same fate as his and that how wonderfully amazing it is that God still by His grace sought to restore us.
The rest was all in all history.
But then again, I later spent that night on a walk with Jeanie along Ortigas wherein we spent the time talking about how God has worked so awesomely in her life and that she still can't fathom the extent of her joy in her newfound relationship with Jesus Christ.
I think we were already in San Miguel Corporate Center when she told me that she feels that we should totally submit our relationship to God, and that would mean that we would choose to forgo with its intimate aspects and settle ourselves as very good friends at the moment.
When I first heard it I must admit that I do not fully share the same sentiments as hers, but as I paused and took the time to think about it I realized something that God revealed during that certain point in time as she said that though she is really that much on fire for God she still feels as though she was not giving a hundred percent of her life to God's Lordship, and in fact the same is also true in my life since I as well.
To cut the story short I agreed with her proposal, and chose the path of friendship. Knowing that it is God who is in control in our lives.
We did this because we loved God, above ourselves and that we both know that its either all or nothing when it comes to submitting our lives to Him.
It is really hard to imagine that we chose God over the almost 6 years of having such close ties, and that it is more so that a number of our close friends cannot believe it either but true enough we did chose it, and that despite of that we could still look back and smile at the memories that we had back then. And that I just know that for whatever those memories were meant back then whether it be good or bad, for what its worth it was worth all the while. If it wasn't for those tapestry of memories we would never have found our place in God's will.
As I look back not once before that decision did I ever thought about such submission to God, since we were not as earnestly seeking His favor then. And is it not such a great comfort that such a thing happened to us because we were only practicing our free will into doing what is right in the eyes of God.
So I guess the terminus of whatever it was that we had back then that we no longer have now, is not such a reason for mourning, because those moments that we spent back then were the best times of our live, and if ever I am a romantic novelist I would defintely include those things that we shared in my novel.
And the mere proof that this decision of ours is of God's will is because of the fact the
blossoming of our love did not die nor does it lie there in the ground rendered with the foul deterioration of emotional rigor mortis.
I thank God that He allowed us to stumble into one another's orbit, and for allowing us to grow together for almost six years straight. Given the chance I'd be more than everything else be thanking Jeanie and speaking this lines: "Because of you I am a better person."
Another is that I'd linke to give her thanks for the memories, and thanks for the understanding that she shared and for the happiest moments in my life that she have shared with me, and I hope that I have been used as a channel of blessing to Jeanie and her family.
I believe it was this pastor named Dennis who said that the perfect picture of human love is not the sight of your beloved one standing right in front of you but the idea of both of you standing side by side looking towards the horizon and seeing what the world has to offer for both of you.
I hope that there are new horizons for us to explore as we travel along life's twists and turns as very good friends.
This is not the end but a mere beginning.
By the way other highlights of the weekends included me being able to play again with the praise & worship team of our church. And that I was also able to have more extra time with Laix and Micheal when all three of us visited the art gallery at Megamall looking at paintings. Another is that Laix also spent the night at our house and we were able to talk a lot about how God has been working in our lives and on the following day he was able to attend the church service at GBC where we both learneed that behemoth and leviathan are both according to biblical scholars are indeed dinosaurs. And that I was able to play United Live's version of Now That You're Near & All About You with the praise & worship team after the service ended.
Lastly I also had a lot of fun spending the rest of the day at this place already bordering to the Southern Luzon area of Parañaque along with Jeanie, Laix and Jem at Chit's house for their town fiesta.
To look back right now I cannot help but feel overly exstatic by the fact that God is making His face shine upon me and all of my newfound friends.
Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. - Psalm 37:4
But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. - Matthew 6:33